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Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
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viridian
Evil Authorlord
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 12:17 am Posts: 1827
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 Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
I've gotten it back from the last beta and should be posting it soon.
I'll add a reply here when it's up.
Everyone say something nice to Bibliophile for getting the back to me earlier than anticipated, even though it's Passover!
_________________ "I think he's just having fun poking into the monkey cage to see us shriek and throw our crap around. I'd take it with a grain of salt (and a banana yuumm)." -ashez2ashes
"I don't think there's a single thread on this site that's managed to stay completely on topic. That's what makes this such a great place." -Random Fan
 Be the Ultimate Ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today!
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| April 19th, 2008, 5:10 pm |
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Lochar
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 8:58 am Posts: 103
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 Re: Chapter 16 discussion thread...
Cheers for the beta's!  Now, the refresh game begins.
_________________
Justin Blaze wrote: Dude, we are all in a forum that is based on an author who writes fanfiction about twelve year old punk kids who can shoot fireballs and summon giant yakuza frogs just by throwing down a bunch of gang signs.
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| April 19th, 2008, 5:44 pm |
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Gullwhacker
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 6:09 pm Posts: 21
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 Re: Chapter 16 discussion thread...
I fear that I won't have much to say of meaning for my second post to this forum. The first, I believe, was eaten by an odd login bug, so this is probably the first anyone will see.
This will also be my first post to this community, come to think of it. All my time spent on the Yahoo group was spent as a lurker.
Well, I'll dredge myself from dormancy long enough to pass on my thanks. Viridian, thanks for writing such engaging stories. Viridian's betas, thank you for all your hard work.
That said, I'll return to eagerly anticipating the upcoming chapters. Looking forward to it!
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| April 19th, 2008, 6:16 pm |
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SilentWasteland
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 3:24 pm Posts: 205
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 Re: Chapter 16 discussion thread...
I'm with Lochar on the refresh game. Of course, I've been doing that since I saw the blog had them going to final beta... 
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| April 19th, 2008, 6:30 pm |
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DeathGod666
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 9:41 pm Posts: 2
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 Re: Chapter 16 discussion thread...
Hey thanks for the news Matt
This has been very good news in a day of darkness.........
Again Thank You
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| April 19th, 2008, 6:39 pm |
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viridian
Evil Authorlord
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 12:17 am Posts: 1827
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 Re: Chapter 16 discussion thread...
DeathGod666 wrote: Hey thanks for the news Matt
This has been very good news in a day of darkness.........
Again Thank You A day of darkness? What happened? Well, if it helps, the chapter has been uploaded now to both sites.
_________________ "I think he's just having fun poking into the monkey cage to see us shriek and throw our crap around. I'd take it with a grain of salt (and a banana yuumm)." -ashez2ashes
"I don't think there's a single thread on this site that's managed to stay completely on topic. That's what makes this such a great place." -Random Fan
 Be the Ultimate Ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today!
My Blip profile: http://blip.fm/invite/Viridian
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:23 pm |
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bibliophile20
Someone set us up the Baum!
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 2:51 am Posts: 821 Location: Rochester, NY
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
And it's up! http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2731239/16/And to all of the amphibian fans... Please don't kill me. EDIT: Damn, Matt beat me. Ah, well...
_________________ Joseph Baum, Team 8 & Out Of The Darkness Beta Reader, Site Moderator
Mod Posts will be in this color
My Fic Journal
Notice: Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
We apologize for the inconvenience.
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:26 pm |
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SilentWasteland
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 3:24 pm Posts: 205
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Edit: First!!
Just got done reading the chapter.
Excellent, as always.
The Naruto/Neji fight was extremely well-written. We are also seeing how Naruto is diverging more and more from canon. I can't imagine canon Naruto turning down the toad contract for any reason.
The Terminator quote, while amusing, did seem a little misplaced. Maybe because I know it's a quote.
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:34 pm |
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bibliophile20
Someone set us up the Baum!
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 2:51 am Posts: 821 Location: Rochester, NY
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
SilentWasteland wrote: The Terminator quote, while amusing, did seem a little misplaced. Maybe because I know it's a quote. Matt has done at least three other shout-outs in NoFP and T8; I don't know why he changed tactics this time, but most of the time, he just stands back and sees who catches it. Most of the time, it's very few.
_________________ Joseph Baum, Team 8 & Out Of The Darkness Beta Reader, Site Moderator
Mod Posts will be in this color
My Fic Journal
Notice: Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
We apologize for the inconvenience.
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:40 pm |
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viridian
Evil Authorlord
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 12:17 am Posts: 1827
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
SilentWasteland wrote: The Terminator quote, while amusing, did seem a little misplaced. Maybe because I know it's a quote. I think that's why. Every other response I imagined coming out of his mouth sounded like a hokey paraphrase of that line. And really, making your own fate is what being a Genius of Hard Work is all about - the antithesis of Nejistic Determinism.
_________________ "I think he's just having fun poking into the monkey cage to see us shriek and throw our crap around. I'd take it with a grain of salt (and a banana yuumm)." -ashez2ashes
"I don't think there's a single thread on this site that's managed to stay completely on topic. That's what makes this such a great place." -Random Fan
 Be the Ultimate Ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today!
My Blip profile: http://blip.fm/invite/Viridian
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:41 pm |
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SilentWasteland
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 3:24 pm Posts: 205
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
bibliophile20 wrote: SilentWasteland wrote: The Terminator quote, while amusing, did seem a little misplaced. Maybe because I know it's a quote. Matt has done at least three other shout-outs in NoFP and T8; I don't know why he changed tactics this time, but most of the time, he just stands back and sees who catches it. Most of the time, it's very few. What are the other three shout outs? Because I have missed those, and now you've piqued my curiousity.
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:43 pm |
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bibliophile20
Someone set us up the Baum!
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 2:51 am Posts: 821 Location: Rochester, NY
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
SilentWasteland wrote: bibliophile20 wrote: SilentWasteland wrote: The Terminator quote, while amusing, did seem a little misplaced. Maybe because I know it's a quote. Matt has done at least three other shout-outs in NoFP and T8; I don't know why he changed tactics this time, but most of the time, he just stands back and sees who catches it. Most of the time, it's very few. What are the other three shout outs? Because I have missed those, and now you've piqued my curiousity. *sigh* Team 8: "Adaptation, Improvisation. But your weaknesses are not your techniques." NoFP: "With great power comes great responsibility." And I'll let you find #3 yourself. 
_________________ Joseph Baum, Team 8 & Out Of The Darkness Beta Reader, Site Moderator
Mod Posts will be in this color
My Fic Journal
Notice: Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
We apologize for the inconvenience.
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:50 pm |
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Mayjest
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 7:55 pm Posts: 7
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Wait a minute, with that last strike, was that a killing blow or a knock out blow. Because if it was a killing blow then that might have been a little harsh, but it it was a knock out blow then I could imagine Neji getting some claw shaped scars on his face. It would be a decent reminder to never abuse Hinata again!
Oh, and council members + Huuga? Evil! I'm assuming that Iruka overhearing that phrase could herald the beginning of that plot being busted wide open?
It's weird. In canon, the Chuunin Exams are the main plot, but in Team 8 because we already know that the invasion will happen, it's the new stuff that has us interested, as we have no idea how to react.
But a very good chapter once again!
That only other thing that has me confused is how you finished the new chapter of NoFP first, yet this got published first. I was kinda hoping you'd release them both at the same time, but apparently not...
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| April 19th, 2008, 7:59 pm |
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Greybane
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 11:29 pm Posts: 1320 Location: Drifting on the eddies of dreams
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
I finished the chapter and all I have to say is Oh My God See some of my previous comments to understand how I feel about your action scenes. But I hope Neji ends up with scars instead of dying. Maybe reminescent of Legacy of the Rasengan? I had never tought about toads eating Shino's bugs, so I must apologize for my previous disscusion as to why Toad Summoning should be included. Well not apologize, but admit I was wrong. It was quite a funny scene though Iruka winning money on betting, who didn't see that coming? But Lee as well, that just made my day! I might add more after I reread everything!
_________________
Take the Magic: The Gathering 'What Color Are You?' Quiz.
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:08 pm |
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Zerrat
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 5:42 am Posts: 405 Location: Australia
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Incredible fight scene. Just... wow.  Neji's probably not dead, just severely beaten. I hope this serves as a wake-up call for the guy. I also loved how Naruto was able to use what he'd learned from his team to defeat Neji - how to block the jyuuken, and how to fool the Byakugan. It was a sweet reminder of the time Naruto pranked Kurenai. Thanks. A novel way to introduce Jiraiya. I loved the Kurenai-rant. Just... loved. Her reasoning for allowing another teacher to take her students in preparation for the exam seemed logical - no favouritism here! Naruto's addition to the con was priceless. Naruto, you rock! Turning down the Toad Summoning? I'm actually impressed! And for a very Team8!Naruto reason. This Naruto may not have to rely on raw power jutsus in order to win, what with his ability to strategise and see 'underneath the underneath'. Like above, Lee's betting on Naruto was probably the BEST part of that chapter. Rock Lee = great. Sakura's introspection was well done, and showed a maturity of thought that doesn't come to her until a LOT later. She's no longer purely fangirling Sasuke, but seeing him as a person. A flawed person. His jumping into training again is very Sasuke, being the driven avenger he is. Doubtless, he saw he has a LOT to learn if the dead last can knock him out in one second flat. Makes me wonder if any of Team 7 were watching the match with Neji. Still no news on Shino's opponent? Damn. Have to wait til next time then! The Hyuga elders discussing Naruto sent a shiver down my spine - now that Neji has been beaten, what will they do? Assassination's almost out of the question because of the ANBU still watching over Naruto. Or have they been recalled in light of Naruto's progress? But this was an absolutely AWESOME chapter. Thank you very much.
_________________ Fanfics Galbadia Hotel for all your game and anime OSTs.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:13 pm |
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forbin
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 2:17 am Posts: 157
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Loved the way that Naruto and the Sandaime ended up manipulating Jiraiya tandem style into training Naruto seriously. And the way that Kurenai tore into the old pervert was beautiful... somebody has a lot of not so repressed anger over gender roles in Konoha and the Elemental Countries it seems.
The fight with Neji was excellent in the amount of pwnage dished out. And even when it looked like Naruto was losing for awhile, it came back seeming like it had all been planned out the way it happened just so he could show Neji how far he was outclassed by one of the so called losers.
The final cliffhanger is a doosie as well. What did Naruto do at the end? Has Neji been horribly maimed, or merely marked to remind him about fate's lack of true power?
Wonderful chapter as usual, can't wait to see what happens next!
_________________
 Be the Ultimate Ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today! Torbin Pace | Bored Moderator (Mod posts will be in this color) Warning: All jokes shall be at your expense.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:15 pm |
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Justin Blaze
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 10:48 pm Posts: 72
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
I must say the the first thing that went through my head after reading this was "Oh no he didn't", but still, the chapter was awsome. However, when you think about it, you just screwed Naruto over in the story. You clearly implied that Naruto used the fox's chakra to finish the fight, so even if you didn't kill Negi, I believe the people who want him dead are going to use that to their advantage. I'm really interested to see how this is going to turn out, is Naruto going to be exiled, or worse. Or will the hokage put his foot down and pimp-smack some uptight huuga councilmen.
_________________

IKSRTFO
I'm Knocking Somebody Right the F*** Out
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:19 pm |
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MrRigger2
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 3:44 pm Posts: 2129 Location: Maryland
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Mayjest wrote: Oh, and council members + Hyuuga? Evil! I'm assuming that Iruka overhearing that phrase could herald the beginning of that plot being busted wide open? That certainly seems to be my thoughts, but frankly, the sight of Iruka taking the upper crust idiot for all they're worth will have me smirking for a long while yet. And I loved that Lee has a squirrel shaped wallet. Naruto-verse people are certainly fond of their animal shaped wallets, aren't they? As an aside, I'm reserving judgement on Naruto not getting the toad contract. I know Matt has a plan, simply because Naruto wouldn't turn it down unless he didn't have a plan, but I've got no idea what it is. And frankly, there's not much that can contend with the toad contract, so I'm just wondering what Matt's up to. And as for Kurenai's comment about most contracts having an exclusivity clause, I'm not entirely certain about that. It makes sense, and I approve, but during Jiraiya's recent fight with Pein, he demonstrated the ability to summon a wide variety of animals, so I'm wondering how exclusive that exclusivity clause is. And just how easy it is to get someone to give up a contract, seeing as how many Pein had. MrRigger
_________________ "As the size of an explosion increases, the number of social situations it is incapable of solving approaches zero." -Vaarsuvius
Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today!
Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past, wisdom is knowing you will be an idiot in the future.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:21 pm |
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Zerrat
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 5:42 am Posts: 405 Location: Australia
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Quote: Or will the hokage put his foot down and pimp-smack some uptight huuga councilmen. I can just imagine it now; Hiashi walks in with a proposal to get Naruto exiled. The Sandaime stands up, reads the proposal and bitch-slaps the Hyuuga leader. Be a nice crack fic! 
_________________ Fanfics Galbadia Hotel for all your game and anime OSTs.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:23 pm |
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DidelotM1
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 2:55 pm Posts: 245
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Well I must say I loved that chapter. VERY well done and props to everyone involved in it. Loved the Terminator quote too, made me smile amid all the asskickery.
As for the end, here's my guess. This is only a guess and I could be, and probably am, utterly wrong.
Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy the seal while giving himself a scar. He wrapped his fist in the fox's chakra before clawing at Neji. My thoughts at first was Naruto did indeed try and kill him, but then I thought what better way to show Neji that his fate isn't determined than by doing to Neji's seal what He did to his own. Thus I guess that Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy or mangle that caged bird seal on Neji's forehead, giving Neji a nice scar in the process, which would account for the blood.
Just my thoughts.
Edit: Also the part with the 'oddly respectful Chunin' I have to ask now that I'm rereading it. That Haku again?
Last edited by DidelotM1 on April 19th, 2008, 9:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:31 pm |
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Kalaras_Of_Haven
Joined: April 19th, 2008, 4:25 pm Posts: 8
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Quote: As an aside, I'm reserving judgement on Naruto not getting the toad contract. I know Matt has a plan, simply because Naruto wouldn't turn it down unless he didn't have a plan, but I've got no idea what it is. And frankly, there's not much that can contend with the toad contract, so I'm just wondering what Matt's up to. Personally, I'd be thrilled if Naruto goes Shadow of the Colossus on Shukaku when the time comes.
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:32 pm |
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Justin Blaze
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 10:48 pm Posts: 72
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
DidelotM1 wrote: Well I must say I loved that chapter. VERY well done and props to everyone involved in it. Loved the Terminator quote too, made me smile amid all the asskickery.
As for the end, here's my guess. This is only a guess and I could be, and probably am, utterly wrong.
Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy the seal while giving himself a scar. He wrapped his fist in the fox's chakra before clawing at Neji. My thoughts at first was Naruto did indeed try and kill him, but then I thought what better way to show Neji that his fate isn't determined than by doing to Neji's seal what He did to his own. Thus I guess that Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy or mangle that caged bird seal on Neji's forehead, giving Neji a nice scar in the process, which would account for the blood.
Just my thoughts. wow, that is pretty clever, actually that makes a little more sense than Neji being dead, because toward the end of the fight, Neji really didn't say anything to rile up Naruto to the point of considering homocide. Oh sure we was still hella mad at Neji but he didn't say anything stupid enough to make Naruto want to kill him.
_________________

IKSRTFO
I'm Knocking Somebody Right the F*** Out
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:36 pm |
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SquirrelyRequiem
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 11:02 pm Posts: 530 Location: Ninety degrees out of phase with reality
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
This was a lovely chapter. The Neji-Naruto match was just incredible, though now I find myself anxiously awaiting the next chapter... Still, incredible! Loved the parts with Iruka and the Toad Hermit and the battle and...
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:45 pm |
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Greybane
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 11:29 pm Posts: 1320 Location: Drifting on the eddies of dreams
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
DidelotM1 wrote: Well I must say I loved that chapter. VERY well done and props to everyone involved in it. Loved the Terminator quote too, made me smile amid all the asskickery.
As for the end, here's my guess. This is only a guess and I could be, and probably am, utterly wrong.
Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy the seal while giving himself a scar. He wrapped his fist in the fox's chakra before clawing at Neji. My thoughts at first was Naruto did indeed try and kill him, but then I thought what better way to show Neji that his fate isn't determined than by doing to Neji's seal what He did to his own. Thus I guess that Naruto used the Fox's chakra to destroy or mangle that caged bird seal on Neji's forehead, giving Neji a nice scar in the process, which would account for the blood.
Just my thoughts. Wow I never thought of that. It could make sense, given how Naruto overloaded his seal, and all the disscussions of seals in the past couple chapters may have sparked the idea in his head. In addition, I have to agrre with an earlier commentator as to wondering what the plan for no taking the Toad contract was. Knowing Matt's writing, it is gonna be good  .
_________________
Take the Magic: The Gathering 'What Color Are You?' Quiz.
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
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| April 19th, 2008, 8:46 pm |
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viridian
Evil Authorlord
Joined: April 18th, 2008, 12:17 am Posts: 1827
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 Re: Team 8 - Chapter 16 - Mortal Combat
Justin Blaze wrote: However, when you think about it, you just screwed Naruto over in the story. You clearly implied that Naruto used the fox's chakra to finish the fight, so even if you didn't kill Negi, I believe the people who want him dead are going to use that to their advantage. Compare this to the canon fight between Naruto and Neji. 
_________________ "I think he's just having fun poking into the monkey cage to see us shriek and throw our crap around. I'd take it with a grain of salt (and a banana yuumm)." -ashez2ashes
"I don't think there's a single thread on this site that's managed to stay completely on topic. That's what makes this such a great place." -Random Fan
 Be the Ultimate Ninja! Play Billy Vs. SNAKEMAN today!
My Blip profile: http://blip.fm/invite/Viridian
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| April 19th, 2008, 9:30 pm |
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